one for the books


my mom is in the middle of a move.
my friend crionaberry was telling me about a deep tissue massage she had this evening.
so, when my mom called to discuss how sore she was, I said, ma, you should go get yaself fondled.
I'm tired ---ok--- it's been a long fucking week. it was a slip o' the tongue. not a fantasy, creepies.
my mom said, what the hell are you talking about?
I said, ma, you know what I mean. a massage. go get a massage.
she asked, and the fondling?
I said, well that's really none of my business, now is it?

we both howled.
how-wled.

I know. shut the fuck up, katie.

all lips are sealed.
good night, gracie.

Comments

Dale said…
I read the first line as My mom's in the middle of a movie. I thought, wow, that Katie's mom, she's some fucking talented.
My mama would slap me if I talked to her like that.

BTW, I promise my meme that you so demurely demanded of me is on the way.

CP
Katie Schwartz said…
gee, daelish, wouldn't that be tits to the tenth.
Katie Schwartz said…
thank you, coaster. tell me when it's up!
Al Sensu said…
Therapuetic massage is great -- I have it every three weeks and would go weekly if I could afford it.

Erotic massage ain't bad either.
Katie Schwartz said…
sensu, isn't that called a rub and tug?
Anonymous said…
i LOVE those conversations, often rare and priceless, between mother and daughter where, just for that moment, they're both WOMEN, not family.

Great little tidbit into your family, K

x
Al Sensu said…
Schwartzie, you are def tuned in. Yes, some crass people say "rub and tug" and others say "happy ending." Just oil it up and let it squirt.
Katie Schwartz said…
me too, honey smack. it's so jarring, but in the very best way.

xo
Katie Schwartz said…
sweet, sensu. grazie

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