1. drug addicts have much more cachet and respect than food addicts 2. you can't quit food 3. if you're a coke whore, you get real thin 4. if you're a heroin addict, you vomit every time you dose. hence, you get thin 5. a meritage of highs await 6. recovering addicts have slogans 7. alienating your family is a guilt free slam dunk 8. it's far more cool to say, I'm jonesing for an 8 ball . it's not even remotely cool to say, man, I'm gettin' the shakes. I gotta score some mac & cheese. 9. recovering addicts get cakes if they maintain sobriety for "x" amount of time 10. volatile and unpredictible mood swings that blow a writer's creative process away!