Katie Schwartz

the hardest part about not mattering to someone is the moment you realize that you don't matter to them and you never really did. (((UPDATE)))--wait-- I am not talking about myself. thank you teeny and evadge for the kind sentiments, but this one isn't about lady hortz.

didjya's see what I did there ? I broke up with times new roman and started doing georgia. there's a kick ass dame in the great state of georgia... it and her, keepers. maybe I'm not supposed to be married to a font. maybe I'm the kind of bird who appreciates different fonts. is that sooo terrible?!

is this poster creepy or is it just me? what are they making? wannabe cupcakes. cruel. cruiel I say.

names (off the top of my head) of men I would never fuck. 1. bartholomew 2. roger 4. cecil, pronounced sessil 5. absolom 6. agapito 7. damien 8. deepnita 9. lance 10. winthrope 11. leonard 12. leviticus 13. langley 14. reginald 15. tanaquil are you seeing a pattern?

can you feel drunk from lack of sleep? not punch drunk, drunk. remember the jingle, ge, we bring good things to life. yeah, it's stuck in my head now. fuck.fuck.motherfuck.

should I... 1. bang my head against a wall? 2. swallow a bottle of pills I can't pronounce? 3. masturbate to the sound of music? 4. thank god I'm not danny bonaduce? 5. make a cons list about sleeping? 6. pee on the floor while singing the national anthem? 7. fantasize about bush being impeached and escorted out of the oral office? 8. play my saxophone naked while eating squeeze cheese and crackers? 9. mercy fuck the homeless man who walked into my house that day. remember ? 10. bang my head against a door?

why is it that when a man cums at night, he can't pass out fast enough. but, when he cums in the morning, it catapults him out of bed?