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Showing posts from August 27, 2006

six million dollar man breaks silence!

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this morning when louie jew and I were at the park, fanny pack made a cameo. it was all very exciting! the conversation went like this: fanny pack: good morning. (I did an over the shoulder glance as a "just in case" he wasn't speaking to me.) me: good morning to you. fanny pack: he sure can jump. (oh my god, you still have the bionic voice. oh, please do a slow motion bionic jump! please, please with sugar on top, please.) me: why yes he can! fanny pack: I'd hate to be that rope! the toy I throw to louie. I know. you know. whatever. me: laughing. laughing. laughing. gratuitous. gratuitous. gratuitous. bitchy or not, it was still a great bionic moment. I wanted to ask if his plastic surgery included any bionic capabilities but I thought that would be rude. do we know if bioboy is seemingly straight or a voracious bottom?

what is wrong with people?

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today, I was minding my own business while stopped at an intersection. I drive a 30-year-old bmw. it ain't flashy. but it's a sweet ride ... to me. albeit not very jew-c of me. but, it was free. it's in mint condition with only 50,000 miles. believe me, my grandmothers are plotzing in heaven from this deal. so, all of a sudden I hear a loud vroom, vroom, vrroooooom next to me. I look over and see mr. midlife crisis, clearly working on wife #3, driving some obnoxious orange cock extender on wheels, staring at me while revving his engine. BUT WAIT. believe me when I say it wasn't sexual. don't hock. let me be in the epicenter of my self esteem crisis in peace. thank you, dahlings. he mouths, "it's on!" mind you, I'm having a perfectly jewrific sunday. I'm driving with my dog, louie, listening to the way we were. a little, sailing by christopher cross. the rose. louie's popping his head out the sunroof. no the window. no the sunroof. I'm d

flash fiction friday....

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even when cormac brown is out of town, he manages to spin one hell of a yarn! check it out, " they call her the breeze ". it's a quick, great read with lots of twists and turns.

amy guth:: writer

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here's a dame with moxie, amy guth . acclaimed writer and anti socialite with an absolute point of view. read her rantings . buy her book, three fallen women . now. not later. come on! she's fabulous. check back on sunday, september 10th to read her interview: amy guth, the wise crackin' feminist behind three fallen women