Tuesday, August 19, 2008

And How Was Your Monday, Katie?

Golly gee willackers, my day started with a glorious stretch and some yoga at home, followed by teeth brushing, flossing, some face washing and ear cleaning (I'm an OCDer to the core with floss and a few Q-tips). I was ready to embrace the day and opened my laptop. A few hours later, I made myself a generous helping of oatmeal served with a side of... Ohhhkkkay, surrealeena?!

While noshing on my meal-of-oats, helicopters circled several buildings bellowing from megaphones Come out with your hands up. I repeat, come out with your hands up and drop your weapon. So, what did my schmucky neighbors do? Run out of their houses and scurry down the street. Great way to get whacked. News?!

I have a friend who is temporarily vegan and gluten free at the minee, too. We commiserate about how torturous it is for us, often. There are so few foods we enjoy. I understand a lot of people love being vegan and gluten free, I think that's fabulous. I'm over the moon for them. I'm just not one of them.

Anyhoodle, every Monday morning my friend stops at a coffee shop for a vegan gluten free blueberry muffin and soy cappuccino. This is her weekly pleasure, she loves it. You can't relate?! Please. Today, she walked in and ordered her ujsh-- it was the last muffin. As she salivated, waiting for her cap and muff, a nun walked in and asked for the same muffin. (MF) My friend said, That's my muffin. I already ordered it. The nun, in a Habit'n'awwwl was dumbfounded, thinking MF was going to give it up for her. The nun, again said to the woman behind the counter, I want that muffin.

MF, I kid you not, screamed, I called dibs on that "Nuffin" and you cannot have it! It's mine, mine, mine. I need that nuffin a lot more than you do. Meanwhile, the woman behind the counter was laughing so hard, thinking MF was going to rip this nun's Habit off and throw down, yo, she fell over, tripping on the guy who was steaming milk, hit her head on the counter. He teetered, drenching wicked hot milk all over the baked goods, slightly scalding MF and the nun.

PS: MF and nun immediately snapped out of it, decided to split the nuffin over coffee and became wicked fast friends. Everyone is okay, by the by

PSS: I got the most wonderful awards from my girl Frannylish (love this dame) and my boy over at Hell's Brimstone (la-ha-ve HELL). I will be posting that dish tonightish. Thank you guys. Ya such mensches. You made my day.

PSSS: Imhaaahjjjes aren't loading. Oy, I know... This will have to be a, dare I say it, image free post.


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