Friday, December 01, 2006

flange watch 2006

I don't know about you, but it seems to me that when major news outlets such as the, New York Daily News, ABC News, Fox News (hate their fucking republican guts), MSNBC, Chicago Sun Times and the New York Post, are all tracking and headlining britney spears vagina, there's a serious problem.

if you google, britney spears vagina, you get over 1,300,000 search results. if you google, britney spears nether region, you get around 11,000 search results.

if you log onto technorati as I just did, you'll see that britney spears is a #1 search; leaving world aids awareness day so far in the dust, it's not even an afterthought.

people are really going for it, aren't they?

psychologists are literally allocating time to think about and speculate about why britney is on a vadge exposing tear. some say it's because she was married to a man who never loved her. yeah. ok. well. she may be the thickest tampon in the box, but I'd like to think she knew that going into it. others say it's a way of showing men she's available. what? like a mating call.

why are brit's lips the toast of such reputable newspapers? and, why are shrink's feasting on her Y to toss in their two cents?

we all need a distraction. hello. when I get so stressed I can't breathe, I devour online gossip like a soccer player stranded in the andes. but, I go to dirty little secret sites dedicated to all things famous, dumb, inane and hardly newsworthy.

does it really matter why britney is exposing her taco? she's a republican. maybe she's trying to get her pussy nominated as a candidate in the next presidential election. since bush has been in office, the enlightened voting american population is pretty hip to what a stupid twat looks like. or maybe she's trying to get a pussy showcase going on Fox with anne cunt coulter.

regardless of her motivation, she's single. young. brags about being southern white trash. and, she's got way too much money and far too much time on her hands. if she wants to follow in the footsteps of her mentors, paris hilton and lindsay lohan, she should knock herself out. flash away, girlie. spread those lips and legs like a gymnast. but, I ask you this, is it really a mainstream newsworthy topic?

in case you haven't seen the pop queen's pussy, knock yourself out: britney's pussy.


John Donald Carlucci said...

I know I only think about britney spears vagina once or twice a day.


John Donald Carlucci said...

Isn't that the most unappealing vagina around? There looks like a huge scar above it and quite a rash under it.

That thing will haunt my nightmare now.

I'll chip in for underwear.


Writeprocrastinator said...

I take it that Britney had a c-section and just what the hell is wrong with pubic hair???

Well, I thank you for the pic, Katie. I figured Perez Hilton would have the Brit pic, as touted up on a radio show that he had the first pic of Lindsay showin' off her cookie. But Perez's site wouldn't boot up on my dial-up.

A couple of years ago at work when hip-huggers and sweat pants were (whatever happened to "Juicy?") plunging and thongs were riding up, all the old-timers were speculating as to when women would do the inevitable, and go commando. Voila'!

Katie Schwartz said...

just the once or twice a day, lewch?

Katie Schwartz said...

now lewchers, in her defense, she did have c-sections. what I can't figure is why you'd want to opt into being sliced.

guess she's never heard of kegels.

Katie Schwartz said...

wp, I am so with you on this. I am enjoying a full bush at the minute. I think it's fabulous.

Dale said...

Excellent analysis and common-tary.

Coaster Punchman said...

Isn't it comforting to know now that the search phrase "Britney Spears' vagina" will now bring people to your blog as well? I certainly sleep better at night now.

Al Sensu said...

Shit, I was just about to go JO after reading my daily sex blogs and then I clicked on the picture. Now I'm all soft again.

Mister Mxyzptlk said...

Here's my favorite Brit story -- I know you've seen it Katie -- just exemplifies what a twit she is. And now that we've seen her nethers, I can say with confidence she is a twit-twat.

Katie Schwartz said...

daleish... you make me laugh so hard.

Katie Schwartz said...

hahahhahahahha. coaster, you are such a wise ass. hahahhahahahahahhahhhahahha.

oops. I peed a little.

Katie Schwartz said...

aww, al, it doesn't give you wood knowing you won't be forced into britney's box?

Katie Schwartz said...

twit twat? omg. mister mister. hahahahahahhahahhaha.

Anonymous said...

Shocking. At a time when her parenting and dignity is highly scrutinised, the custody battle dogs will love this.


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