Katie Schwartz

my vagina and I got into a HUGE knock down drag out fight this morning. I suspended her vibrator privileges a few days ago, so she decided to lead a revolt against me. she's threatening me with a yeast infection. what a snatch! so cunty sometimes, you know? due to elevated horniness, she's been insatiable. it's becoming a problem. is it soo much to ask that she be a little sensitive to my needs?! I'm a very busy person. I don't have time to cater to her every moistened wish. I mean, gaahhhd. she can be so slutty sometimes, too. I'm so not like that. I'm far more reserved. I don't need it the way she does. as always, I'm conflicted. I hate to censor her of course, or anyone else, but we have to learn to co-exist a bit better. donchya think? it can't always be about HER and HER needs. when did vaginas corner the market on neediness?! *that isn't a fucking pun!* -- save our boobies: boobiethon.com

each week, into my brain pops new or existing fears to add to or expound on my rolodex of agida. you think it's easy being a neurotic chubby jew broad? it ain't. it's a lot of time, work and preperation. my fears this week... 1: I never want to be a sloppy menstruator. the kind of dame who let's ruby flow wherever she damn well pleases. 2: fingernail cancer. 3: running out of menstrual pain medication. 4: being fat with se's for the rest of my fuckin' life. 5: upcoming blood test results. 6: louie's ginormous lump on his shoulder and ankle -oy- this is the mamabootzah of ahj. 7: being stuck. you know what I mean. 8: becoming incontinent 9: my uterus dropping and crashing my vaginal canal right along with it. and, a total inability to then see my womb as the fabulous accessory it can be! 10: that the creative juices are being sucked out of my brain and heart forever! -- the only upside to insomnia is blogging. boobiethon.com : october is breast cancer awarene...

these are the things he probably says: 1: I'm way more of a god than jesus was. 2: four more years! four more years! 3: suck it harder, rummy, for' I bitch slap your sweet ass. 4: oh, condi, you da best dirty little secret I never had. save women's boobies! boobiethon.com

has jew hating become a fetish yet? I fear it's cumming. -- great articles jew review same sex marriage frank rich's essay : the joy of gay marriage show your titskeas for breast cancer awareness: bobbiethon !