Katie Schwartz

It's August, 2nd, 2008 and I have been doing a lot of thinking. Please, I spend so much time in my head, I blew " oy vey " away 10-years ago and replaced it with " oy gevalt ". Seriously, yo. I'm a brain dwelling freak'o nature, which wouldn't be so terrible if I wasn't a raging insomniac. I haven't really slept properly in about a week. What sleep deprived person do you know has perspective? I've been an irritable snatcharella on wheels. I know it and you know it. Impossible to communicate with in any meaningful fashion. God willing, I'll sleep tonight. Tomorrow, I'll wake up feeling, oh, I don't know, human. I'd love to say, refreshed, but that's a stretch. I have never excelled in the art of sleep. It's never been my sport of choice. I envy those who can hit the pillow and fall hard. My sister is a great sleeper. I wish I had that gene. My ma says she had insomnia in her 30s, too and chalks it up to hormones. ...

can you feel drunk from lack of sleep? not punch drunk, drunk. remember the jingle, ge, we bring good things to life. yeah, it's stuck in my head now. fuck.fuck.motherfuck.

should I... 1. bang my head against a wall? 2. swallow a bottle of pills I can't pronounce? 3. masturbate to the sound of music? 4. thank god I'm not danny bonaduce? 5. make a cons list about sleeping? 6. pee on the floor while singing the national anthem? 7. fantasize about bush being impeached and escorted out of the oral office? 8. play my saxophone naked while eating squeeze cheese and crackers? 9. mercy fuck the homeless man who walked into my house that day. remember ? 10. bang my head against a door?