Katie Schwartz

LOS ANGELES (June 1) - Lark Voorhies, who played Lisa Turtle in TV's "Saved By the Bell," has sued The National Enquirer for libel over an article that included claims she had a drug problem. The suit, which seeks unspecified damages, was filed Tuesday in Superior Court. The suit says Voorhies, whom it describes as a "famous and popular actress," lost several "potential acting and hosting jobs" after the tabloid published a June 2005 article that said she was hospitalized for a cocaine addiction. since when is a drug problem a career killer? can you say, robert downey jr, charles bukowski, elvis presley, kate moss and... am I leaving anyone out? oh, that's right, 60% of hollywood. bad katie. if I were her, I wouldn't want to go back to waiting tables either.

dc comics is launching a lesbian bat woman . that is fan-fuckin-tastic! I've called every queen I know to congratulate them. oh to be animated.

it's no secret that I've become obsessed with christian homeschool families and zealot christians. I'm writing a super dark comedy about it. hey, at least I know it had a purpose in my life. gaahhhd?! in the meantime, during my online travels, I happened upon, hal lindsey, divine oracle, and this article about his show, the international intelligence briefing being canceled from tbn. he knew it was coming because god told him satan was about to launch a grand scale attack on his supreme high-ugliness. Apparently, halolicious was not reporting accurate news, and speaking too highly o' the heebs and spouting anti-muslim rhetoric at the speed of light. so, I decided to email him about his tbn suspends iib post: But you aren't reporting the truth, Hal, anymore than TBN is. You give food, clothing and a roof to the desperate poor international communities in exchange for a commitment to Christianity. What you practice is extortion and intolerance; a total lack of respe...