Guess what season it is

this time of year, if I'm single, which I am, it always feels like cock hunting season. like god forbid I spend the holidays and valentine's day without a man. because it's the worst possible thing that could happen to a girl.

like I need to drag my fat ass out and strategically hunt for relationship dick NOW.

and, the fact that I haven't found commitment peeny makes me a fucking inadequate freak-tard, incapable of the shrewdness required to manifest a man.

well, FUCK THAT!

so, I'm a pain in my own ass. so, I like impossible men who couldn't possibly fulfill my needs. so, I have issues with emotional intimacy. compared to the men I am attracted to, I'm still a rook. so what gives?!

has it occurred to the self help set that I am choosing to be single for yet another holiday season until I can eradicate these issues? does it make me that much of a vile, disgusting, shameful whore bag?! since when does a meat free holiday season or two equate to relationship loser?!

gaaaaaaaahd!

--

show your boobies right now for breast cancer research:: boobiethon.com

Comments

yournamehere said…
I would like to give you my meat for the Holiday Season. It's the gift that keeps giving the whole year 'round.
12:25 PM
Katie Schwartz said…
mullet boy, you are the most selfless human being I've ever known. how generous are you?! boundless, I tell you!
9:17 PM
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