Sunday, November 30, 2008

WHY AM I SUCH A FREAK O NATURE

I am looking for an apartment as yas all know. Admittedly, I have weird ass requirements. Not that any of you are shocked, of course. Me being me and all.


The sound of vertical blinds clacking like cheap, hollow high heels is so unnerving, it's worse than fingernails on a chalkboard. And carpeting. Please.... I can't breathe. It's a fiber-allergen waiting to attack.


A building that looks like this, screams death on toast with a peach schnapps back. In California, I can't live in a high rise either. I'm an e-quake phobe.

No. No. No. This kitchen is wrong on too many levels. It's a claustrophobe-mare with a pink flower to boot. What the fuck?! White is good, sure. It's that half wall situation that's got me jeaned out and hello, whatever happened to refrigerators?! Ya can't throw in a fridge? Suck my menstruating ovaries.


We need to digress for a minee. Buildings like this also jean me out. Wanna know why? It feels college dormy, even though we're strangers leading our own lives, let's all BFF. I'll pop over all the time, OMGeers. No. So not gonna happen.


Our tour is almost over. If the person who actually posted this, thought the image of Euro-daddy-architect and chick-who-won't-date-him-unless-he-has-a-brand-new-BMW is the kind of building I would consider, they couldn't be more incorrect. Then again, I just might be the trash they're trying to weed out.

I found what I love. Click FLOOR PLANS . In the bottom left corner you'll see little photos. Click each, to see the bigger picture of each mini-pic. This is my kinda joint, so stunning, I'm plotzarella from this place.

15 comments:

Beth said...

I have three bedrooms. I've never had a roomie, except when I lived in sin, but I'd let you move in.

Dale said...

Super sexy, I want that place too! Share?

Tanya Espanya said...

Ohmygod! I can't wait to visit! And I love giving housewarming giftees!

DCup said...

Okay, well, they had me at 1925 architecture. Need a well-endowed maid who can speak some French?

FranIAm said...

Plotzarella is right. And downtown LA is so all the rage.

Oh seeing those photos you took gave me a bad acid trip to me looking for digs in May 1998. Oy, it was one bad thing after another until I found my groovalicious 1940's era townhouse in Los Feliz.

Be choosy, be choosy. You have to live there for God's sake.

John Donald Carlucci said...

"Need a well-endowed maid who can speak some French?"

Um, YES!

Emailing my address RIGHT NOW!

JDC

Eebie said...

Très shi-shi place. Very nice.

DCup, j'ai besoins d'une bonne mais malheureusement, mon appartement est nettement moins chic. Quand-même, c'est dans un beau quartier de New York.

Bubs said...

I especially liked the jaunty music they played when you visited the website.

That place looks cool--vintage architecture, great floor plans...

Now, how do you politely ask about any hammer-pounding wackadoos living next door?

Cormac Brown said...

"Admittedly, I have weird ass requirements."

I know, you are going to have to come down from that "no hammer-wielding neighbors" demand, Katie-lah! It is just all too stuck-up!

Molly The Dog said...

I really like it! Very swanky. The first ones you looked at were yucky. I'm all about hardwood floors too. Carpet is too germy for me. If I only knew you, I'd try and bum a stay.

Karen Zipdrive said...

Cool pad.
Makes me miss L.A.

travelingman said...

Katie,

You can always move to Charlotte and live in my fabulous three room apartment that is attached to my house. Hell I would even put in Hardwood Floors for ya and it has a view of the woods with deer on a regular basis.

I wish you lots of luck finding a place...It sucks when you are trying to find a new place and my heart goes out to you. Hopefully you will not have anymore hammer bangers at the next place. :)

Gail said...

that kitchen is downright creepy and you are hilarious!

Would someone give this woman a show already?

BAC said...

I can see why you love it!


BAC

Distributorcap said...

it is so LA.. oh it is LA

 

design by suckmylolly.com