Sunday, September 14, 2008

Too Delicious Not to Pass Along

Just got this via email, Obama vs. Palin & McCunt.

I'm a little confused. Let me see if I have this straight.....

If you grow up in Hawaii, raised by your grandparents, you're "exotic, different."?

Grow up in Alaska eating mooseburgers, a quintessential American story?

If your name is Barack you're a radical, unpatriotic Muslim?

Name your kids Willow, Trig and Track, you're a maverick?

Graduate from Harvard law School and you are unstable?

Attend 5 different small colleges before graduating, you're well grounded?

If you spend 3 years as a community organizer, become the first black President of the Harvard Law Review, create a voter registration drive that registers 150,000 new voters, spend 12 years as a Constitutional Law professor, spend 8 years as a State Senator representing a district with over 750,000 people, become chairman of the state Senate's Health and Human Services committee, spend 4 years in the United States Senate representing a state of 13 million people while sponsoring 131 bills and serving on the Foreign Affairs, Environment and Public Works and Veteran's Affairs committees, you don't have any real leadership experience?

If your total resume is: local sportscaster, 4 years on the city council and 6 years as the mayor of a town with less than 7,000 people, 20 months as the governor of a state with only 650,000 people, then you're qualified to become the country's second highest ranking executive?

If you have been married to the same woman for 19 years while raising 2 daughters, all within Protestant churches, you're not a real Christian?

If you cheated on your first wife with a rich heiress, and left your disfigured wife and married the heiress the next month, you're a Christian?

If you teach responsible, age appropriate sex education, including the proper use of birth control, you are eroding the fiber of society?

If, while governor, you staunchly advocate abstinence only, with no other option in sex education in your state's school system while your unwed teen daughter ends up pregnant, you're very responsible?

If your wife is a Harvard lawyer who gave up a position in a prestigious law firm to work for the betterment of her inner city community, then gave that up to raise afamily, your family's values don't represent America's?

If you're husband is nicknamed "First Dude", with at least one DWI conviction and no college education, who didn't register to vote until age 25 and once was a member of a group that advocated the secession of Alaska from the USA, your family is extremely admirable?

OK, much clearer now.


Freida Bee said...

Katie, Why do you hate America so much?

Katie Schwartz said...

HAHAHAHAHAHA. Great response, doll.

Karen Zipdrive said...

I finally broke down and said it over at Chez Zipdrive. Anyone who's still buying what McCain & Palin are selling is a fucking idiot.

KELSO'S NUTS said...

JG: Could the Caribou Barbie family possibly be any more trayf?

Sarah Palin herself is a mindfuck to listen to. Nobody except maybe in Martin Mull's HISTORY OF WHITE PEOPLE IN AMERICA could possibly have a voice like that.

Todd Palin, The "First Dude". It was only a few weeks before the convention that he cut his hair and trimmed his beard and got rid of the Aryan Brotherhood/Harley clothing. I am sure he has no fewer than 9 tattoos at least one of which is a swastika.

The son who has "bravely volunteered" to serve in Iraq was actually given a choice of that or stacking 3 years of state time for battery.

The teenaged daughter who's being used as livestock. And I think it's a tossup whether the baby she's carrying belongs to her boyfriend or father.

And, of course, THERE'S THE BUBBLE-BOY!

Trayf, I tell you. Trayf.

Katie Schwartz said...

I am thrilled you did, KZip. I am heading over to your bloggy blog to check that out, yo.

Katie Schwartz said...

Kelso, it's nice to see you. I miss ya.

Caribou Barbie meshpucha -- perfection.

I so agree with you re: Todd Palin. He feels like he has the potential to be super anti-Semitic.

Re: the son, are you serious? How did you find out that dish? Where is the URL? The S-H-A-M-E

Don't you think Trig is hers and not the mothah's?!

Fabulous comment, doll.

Anonymous said...

Oooh... I really liked this one. Sometimes these snarky comparisons help remind me why I'm down with Obama. Thanks!

Sylvia said...

That's excellent!


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