how many dependents can you claim?

I was asked this question today in a very matter-of-factly kind of way. it got me to thinking. I'm single. I have a dog. technically, I have one dependent, me. in actuality, I have 10.

why shouldn't my shortcomings count as dependents?! god knows they're time consuming, life sucking expenses that drain katie's economy. there's, needy bitch (only when I am pms'ng). ass pain of the year (that's me way too inside my head). angry cunt (it's justified*). resentful cow (also justified). idealistic, naive and prone to fits of, look on the bright side (that counts for three). incessant, unrelenting frustration (it's justified). overactive fear of death and neuroses glands. self esteem is a casualty of all of the above.

fuck dependents, I shouldn't be taxed at all.

--
(it's justified*) shut the fuck up. it's my blog. if I want to trek down the river of denial on an obscenely overpriced, luxurious, ecologically friendly yacht for another day or more, that's my perogative. capisce?!

Comments

Anonymous said…
Include this post with your next tax return. Someone might approve it.
5:59 AM
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