Thursday, December 28, 2006

katie hearts blair

as many of you know, I email blair for guidance and to comment on some of her unsavory, anti-christian posts.

if she is going to truly represent the body of christ, I expect puritanical zealotry!

she never responds, but she's really busy. I'm sure she will one day, and on that day the skys will part and the light will shine on me.

I dropped her a line today, you know, to check in.

here's the email I sent:
hey lees:

how's it going? did you and the caubles have a good CHRISTmas? whadya's do? I'm sure it was a big ol' nog fest, huh? did you go to church? I didn't see you there. not that I was there, but I have spies. I'm in the loop. you're not the only broad with a mainline to the big j.

I went for chinese and a movie. nothing special. don't worry, I won't admit anything. I hope you know you can email me back. you won't be like damned to hell or anything.

hey, do you and steve have CHRISTmas sex? what's the rule on that? do we know? can you masturbate? or is that like a TOTAL sin squared? I didn't do either. but, I always thought it would be fun to role-play something thematic and vintage, like, bc cross hanging. I guess that's sorta s&m-ee and that's not really my thing, but you might dig it. oh, I know, jesus saving mary magdalene. could be hot and you just need a few potato sacks for costumes.

what are you doing for new years? any big plans? I'm hangin' with jewcifer and making some homemade goodies. very low key.

have a great new years!



Anonymous said...

s&m-ee is my new favourite word.

Coaster Punchman said...

Although I'm generally not a big fan of silly Internet abbreviations, because of your friendship with Lisa Welchel I am now ROTFLMFAO!

This series of yours is going to be my favorite thing for 2007!

Love, CP

Anonymous said...

I hope you're leaving her your url so she can read and see how worthy you are of a response.

Christ says to be polite doesnt he? Why the fuck isnt she responding?

I bet she masturbates and calls His name.

katie schwartz said...

yes, we love s&m-ee. it's commitment enough to s&m. very "ish".

katie schwartz said...

cp, you're such a sweet pea. you just tossed me a core internet acronym. I'm touched.

I'm a total lisa welchel whore bag.

she's too much, isn't she?

katie schwartz said...


I am leaving her my url and my email address and bupkas! can you believe it?! she's so anti-christian. it's a shonda really.


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