Dish and That

Keywords All the Way from Oy to Vey came up on this week: Famous Pussy, Vintage Pussy, Vintagepussy, Vaginas and Big Vaginas. First and foremost, what happened to Cunt? My blog is no longer cunt worthy? Is this a new trend I should worry about? Secondly, and I realize how irrational this is, but my blog is much more than the vagina I dish up. I'm just sayin'.

I'd like another Sunday. I'm not ready for Monday. I'd like two Sunday's a week, wouldn't that be dandyrific? I think so.

I can't stop listening to Flo Rida's song "Low". Great song to walk to.

I schlepped to the cooking store today for cookware and the shtunk was so vile, heavy-duty-nostril-killing-eyes-burning-chemicalsquared-floor wax. You know when a scent is so heavy, it gets lodged in your throat for the day? This was that. Oy vey. Worse, no matter where I was in the store, mop daddy of doom magically appeared, screaming at me for walking over his freshly mopped floors. After a half dozen encounters, I got so frustrated, I screamed, "HEY, if you want to make a sale today, ya might wanna re-think your mopping strategy, like oh, I don't know, mopping BEFORE the store opens or AFTER it closes." I threw my would-be-purchases down and bailed. Fuck that. They can keep their fuckin' pots and pans.

This weekend, I became obsessed with my Twitter friend, DarryleP's new blog Click for Clutter. I can't stop clicking. Here's the dish, you can vote for Darryle to keep an item, or tell her why she should give it to you, or let her know why she should keep it. Miss D has kick ass tchoch and you know what a tchoch queen I am. Her bloggy feeds both my ebay and blog addictions. Fab.

Cormac Brown has spun two yarns that you absolutely must read, I'm not kidding. You know how Cormac does his stories: dark, noiree and vintylicious. Retribution on Page 54 in Crooked Magazine, Eastern Standard Crime and Think Inside the Box.

Don't forget to make reservations for THREE DAMES MAKE A QUEEN.

There's a new letter posted at Dear Thyroid called Thyroidlicious, a must read, it's funny, clever and touching.

Loving....
Jewgirl

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

SPEAKING OF ABORTIONS

Image
Menses just commenced. It's 1:14 AM. I was asleep. That felt good. At 12:24, I popped up. I think I'm awake, maybe awakeish is more accurate. I'm always surprised when those handy-soapy-foamy-bottles run out of soap. For some lame ass reason, it never occurs to me that they ever will. They feel so lifetime supply , even though the bottles aren't more than 8 inches tall. Similarly, when I flip on a light switch and the light flickers to its death, I think "Now what?" Duh, schmuckette, you change the fucking light bulb . Intellectually, I know this, yet for some odd reason, it never comes to mind. In fact, a few years ago, my mother walked into my house and said, "Why aren't the lights working?" I said "I don't know, I flick the switch and they don't work." After a fit of uproarious laughter, she said, "Would it kill you to change the light bulb?” Hmmm. "No", I shamefully responded. I wonder why... it is that I hav...
Read more

Best Spam Evaaaaaaaaaaah -UPDATE-

Image
Look what I found in my box today?! Aside from the fact that I'm a VADGE and there is a glaring typo " fie" instead of " fine" , they've made this dame a raging cunt- hate that (and her high, tight rack. Bitch ). Women don't behave this way. Women aren't cunty. Women don't emasculate men. That is not how we roll, yo. UPDATE : From the fabulous and flawless MonkeyMucker : Actually hon that's not a typo. the word "fie" is a somewhat rare wordthat is used to denote scorn or used in place of a swear or curse word.It was more popular in the old days, like say during the 16th thru 19th centuries . Who knew?! I had no idea. Simianboy, you're a wealth of knowledge. Grazie. Penis enlargement patches also do not work. If you want to keep your junk intact, don't be stickin' things in it, or on it that can damage the meat bat. Don't let anyone make you feel badly about your manhood, either. It's your dick, live it. Love it....
Read more

Get Listen Up

Image
Have you seen the infomercial for Get Listen Up ? I thought the idea of a product that turns "Ordinary hearing into Extroidinary hearing" was too camp for words. In the mersh, a hospitable narrator takes you through all kinds of folks using it in church, hunting, watching television, listening to your spawn on the playground, all doable, right? Right. I was sold, too. Until.... my friendly narrator lady said "Listen to what your neighbors are saying about you." Okay, creeparella, how very big brother. Watch the mersh . Doreen sent me a kick ass, smart ass article this week in the NY Times called, " Skin Deep - Hey, Mom, the Rabbi Approved my Tattoo ". Speaking of Diva Doreen, I finished her flawless, brilliant book Queen of the Road (it's tits to the tenth, children) and she's graciously allowed me to interview her. I'll be posting that this week and you will love every word. Frannylish sent me, in her words an "oy gevalt" article ...
Read more