Saturday, June 23, 2007

peeny respite

I'm taking a peenyatus (penis hiatus). why isn't penis spelled, peenis? cock hunting will resume in the fall. I'm actually quite glad I'm taking a dick break. cbb (can't be bothered) with dishing, jhsushing, hymen sparring -- none of it. by the time I'm ready to throw myself back on the market, my cuntarella will be one ravenous whore. I can live with that.

menses watch 2007 continues. the hurricane is so epic, I'm ready to send in the encyclopedia of maxi-pads. let's hope it doesn't come to that. wiki says that each cycle only produces 80 ml of blood (1/2 cup). right. more like 180 ml (1 cup). show me a dame who produces a half cup per cycle and I'll show you the menstrual reduction pill she's gobbling.

whatchya's doin this weekend? juice and I are schlepping to the park. I'm writing. cleaning. hitting a few gayroohj sales and probably ebaying myself into a frenzy. speaking of egay (it is a queens paradise, donchya know), the cunt who packaged my syrocos in her garbage sent me the most disingenuous apology. sorry. will refund money. I emailed a few executives at the bay of e and they didn't e-stalk me back. I know they read my stalks because I did a read receipt. bunch'o bitches.

I'm off like a prom dress. have the best weekend. don't panic (as if schwartzy), I'll post more dish this weekend.


Anonymous said...

"...dishing, jhsushing, hymen sparring..."

I prefer the term:

"Gamete swapping"

We'll see you in September then?

Anonymous said...

"...whatchya's doin this weekend?..."

Waiting for some lazy cunt to post a comment on my blog.

Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

I swear to god, I love you more with every post I read.

Writeprocrastinator said...

"why isn't penis spelled, peenis?"

Because, then every man would use it like a ball-peen hammer?


design by