Sunday, November 19, 2006


in a queer ass attempt to deal with myself, I'm going to do something I don't normally do. actually, it was dale's essay about his childhood, Passion Of The Dale: Strangers With Chips, that I read a few weeks ago that gave me the moxie to do this today. I've been conflicted about it. wp can tell you. I posted it months ago and then ripped it down as quickly as it went up. but, there are a few reasons I'm sharing it. one, women need to know about it. two, I hope it begets a change I need to make.

graves becomes her

there's a comment rule on this. no empathy. no sympathy. I'm serious. no empathy. no sympathy or I will hunt you down and vomit all over you.

go with god,


Jeff Harrell said...

Oh, quit whining, you damn whiner.

(What? I'm just following instructions.)

The top ten best things about having a debilitating disease nobody's ever heard of:

10. Suddenly you have an opinion on Medicare.

9. What with all the reading, you know EXACTLY what they're talking about when you watch "House."

8. Guaranteed, there's a non-profit organization out there that wants you to be its spokesman.

7. It totally rocks to be able to be pissed about stuff you really can't do anything about for a change.

6. It's exactly like winning the lottery, only instead of fat sacks bulging with money, you get dramatic mood swings and explosive diarrhea. But other than that, it's exactly the same.

5. You will never have to pay for a speeding or traffic ticket again. Ever.

4. I've looked and looked, but I haven't found any hard upper age limit on that "Make a Wish" foundation thing. Just sayin'.

3. Telethon after telethon after telethon.

2. You no longer have to worry about getting sick. So THAT's a major weight off your shoulders.

1. Suddenly you have an endless source of stuff to blog about.

Al Sensu said...

If you haven't yet, please look into homeopathy. It doesn't always work (but neither does standard medicine), but it can provide breakthroughs, decrease your dependence on allopathic drugs, and best of all is safe. I'm sure you can find a good homeopath in LA. Unfortunately insurance won't cover, unless you move to England.

Dale said...

I liked Jeff's #6 but I'd change it to say ...only instead of fat sacks bulging with money, it's your eyes that bulge...

And Barbara Bush needs someone to chat or drool with so how can you be so selfish sitting there in your own itchy misery?

Although I'm not sure how my 'chips' led you to post, I'm glad you did just the same.

I bet Blair's at her gist's office, that's why you can't track her down. Copycat beeyotch.

Peace out.

katie schwartz said...

harrell: thanks for the laugh, toots.

katie schwartz said...

thanks, sensu. I'm on it.

katie schwartz said...

potd, have you read chips? re-read it. it's very fuckin' personal. I fuckin admired you for it, ok. gaaahd

Dale said...

You've got a point Katie, sorry, someday I'll write some of the stuff I left out of the story. Off to look for Lisa.

Writeprocrastinator said...

I'm glad you had the courage to repost this. Salute, asante and salud.

John Donald Carlucci said...

I think the Make-A-Wish Foundation presents a great chance for you. You could request to spend the day with Lisa Welchel. She has to do it because she knows she'll go to Hell if she doesn't hang out with sickies.

BTW - It isn't shallow K.


Mars said...

I guess this means we can't be friends.

oh, no, wait, that's for fascists.

Nicole Criona said...

I say go for the lisa welchel wish.
I also say go for the sympathy. milk it while you can, baby, 'cause you know remission is right around the corner then you will have lost your chance.

katie schwartz said...

wp, I do so adore you, child.

katie schwartz said...

thanks, lewch.

katie schwartz said...

mars, are you discriminating against those with hyperthyroidism only? or are all thyroid challenged individuals included in the ban?

katie schwartz said...

crionaberry, I love the make a wish thing. can you imagine?

hi, make a wish, I want lisa welchel to spend the day with my fat hyperthyroid ass. NOW.



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