Sunday, April 09, 2006

those couples

there are certain couples that are so fucking annoyingly cliché and inappropriate. you know the ones.

she's got blonde hair just below the shoulder with off putting bangs and he's got an overgrown military shag and goatee.

they wear outfits.

they sit in booths next to each other making out, barely eating and gazing into each other's eyes like the world has stopped in the hopes their hideousness will procreate.

they take sears photos and have print themed throw blankets over their sofas, not couches.

they drive navy blue tricked out hondas and live in places we've never heard of like, Corona, Covina, Spartan -- always off of three fucking freeway intersections!

they drink bud light.

they have refrigerator magnets that say, "the bitch is hitched." "thank god it's friday or I'd have to kill you."

they eat at black angus.

they buy mall pear shaped diamond rings and have 15 bridesmaids in lime green taffeta. they get shamelessly drunk at their weddings. he fucks her maid of honor. she fucks his father.

they have sons named, cody and daughters with ride-the-pole-slutty names like, frankie and charlie.

I haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaate these couples.

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