Katie Schwartz

Beautiful babies, I have officially moved. I will not be deleting this blog, ever. I am in a new spot where I will be ranting and raving. You know how I do. Come visit me at KatieSchwartz.com . Come on, don't be shy. You can do this. We'll do it as a family. Ready. Set. Click .

BREATHE. STAY WITH ME. EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OOOOKAAAAY. IF YOU CLICK THIS LINK , I PROMISE IT WON'T BITE. LOVING...

@ Anastasia_Smith of The Sister Project , follow them on Twitter @ sisters , wrote a gorgeous post about her thyroid, sisterhood and Dear Thyroid. Please read, From The Threads of Thyroid Tales . Thank you! Isn't she a honey? Click on over and read. *cross posted at DearThyroid .

This morning I woke up to Old Jews Telling Jokes in my box, courtesy of my girl, FranIAm . OJTJ is so funny, I think I want to marry the website.

Good morning! If you've been following my tweets, @katieschwartz , you know that my pal VeronicaWords , is working like a dawg to, well, save dawgs. From VW: "Here’s the scoop from @VeronicaWords : vote 4 us! http://is.gd/3EQR Fill in Pike County Humane Society Milford PA & Search. then select us. Animal verification, that’s it!". It's a great shelter and you can vote every day, so please do. They're in desperate need of the fundage. Off you go to vote for canine hope . My dad joined Twitter, @jsbrooklyn . I'm plotzing. @TanyaEspanya , doll that she is, friended my pops. As far as dark humor is concerned, you'll quickly learn the apple does not in fact fall far from the tree, not at all. Friend him, ga'head. I think he knows how to follow back, if not my brother, @nicktony will show him, I'm sure. I'm obsessing about the song, Caribbean Queen, for reasons I can't explain, and the mispronunciation of the word, "Caribbean". I...

In response to the Red Envelope Project , I have launched the Silver Envelope Project . I posted about my disdain and contempt for the REP, you might have read it here, Abortion, The Breakfast of Champions . My objective for the Silver Envelope Project is for legions of women who are pro-choice, to join me in posting written letters, video letters and photo/collage letters to the Silver Envelope Project blog, to virally syndicate our message as aggressively as they are. I hope you'll review and send me lots of letters and get involved!

As we've discussed a blog is one part confessional, right? Right. Today, I was reminded of the ultimate shamevent, I was with my ma and we were at the Farmer's Market buying produce, minding our own business when I happened upon my ex . He didn't see me -- I saw him -- which was MORE than enough to make me run -- like a virgin towards the starting quarterback. I flew through the market. My ma, is, of course, fast on her feet and didn't need me to explain anything, she just followed. PS: That's love. So terrified he would see me, I made my way into the back of the market and dove into a dumpster. Yes, I know that's disgusting. Whatevs, a girl does what a girl has to do. A few minutes later, I could hear my mother laughing her ass off while leaning against the dumpster, so I peeked my head out of the top. Through tears, she said to me, "What the fuck is wrong with you, child?" I whispered, "I saw my ex, he was buying avocados. Remember he used to ca...