Katie Schwartz

so, haglette the hellnine is home! this pleases me to no end. of course he's miserable. I can't say that I blame the child. he has 15 staples on his left inner thigh and his leg looks like a giant turkey leg. poor kid. he's horizontal. I'm keeping him as high as a kite and hand feeding him chicken dripping in chicken juice. he's not drinking water. hey, $4,028 later, at least he's on the mend! when the billing chick said, we won't worry about the 36 cents, I raised my eyebrow like... then why mention it? you call this a financial break? thank god he's ok. that's all I care about. he's got a follow up appointment in two-weeks and his surgeon goddess assures me that in two months, he'll be back to his old self again! 95% capacity. how fabulous is that. go louie! go louie!

LINCOLN, Neb. (May 26) - A judge's decision to sentence a 5-foot-1 man to probation instead of prison for sexually assaulting a child has angered crime victim advocates who say the punishment sends the wrong message. well isn't that just fuckin grand?! so, he wouldn't survive in prison? pedophiles have never been released in the general prison population anyway. beleive it or not there is a code of ethics in lockdown. molesting and raping children hardly fit into acceptable crimes amongst the criminal set. 10-years of probation?! that is so fucked up. what's even worse is that the short people brigade is actually speaking out on behalf of this scumbag, shouting, "it's about time we were recognized." yeah, I'd want this to be my fight too! mini dumb ass bitches. WASHINGTON (May 26) - Staunch allies in a long, unpopular war, President Bush and British Prime Minister Tony Blair acknowledged making painful mistakes in Iraq. Bush said Thursday night he wish...

I was up all night last night. the angst and ahj in anticipation of my meeting with the surgeon today and louie's being under the knife kept me stalking all fuckin night. I am so tired. my body feels sucked dry, but I can't sleep. too much angst. I'm keeping busy though. can't you tell?! I'm actually working. this would be a stress reduction break. I just realized that I'm the only woman in my building with big breasts. I wonder why that is? even chuveena down the hall is short on the rack. I got louie shaved and bathed in oatmeal yesterday so that he would be super comfortable over the next two-months while he recovers. I drink entirely too much coffee. I found a $700 dog bed. the god damned shame! as if. do I look like britney-baby-killer-spears?! I can't afford that. note to self: don't forget to buy antihistamines for the jewergies.

do we know if women get os (ovulating syndrome)?!

so... louie jew is on the slab. the guilt. it's unbearable. but, I keep telling myself I'm doing the right thing. thanks to doc , and her invaluable insight, I did a ton of research and found a fantastic surgeon who is an expert in tplo knee surgery. she's fantastic. of course if she whacks my dog she won't be, but I'm trying to give her the benefit of the doubt. this rant would be a coping mechanism. just in case you were wondering.

after a day at the vet's, we learned that louie jew has destroyed, severed, ripped and completely torn his ligament. must he one up me all the time?! I had my meniscus removed. guess how much this pleasure is going to cost? ask me if those god damned orthopods will accept payments? the answer is a big fat fuck no. brace yourselves. here it comes. a quote so heinous, I tossed my cookies. $4,800. mother of god.

New Iranian law to require Jews to wear yellow band By JPOST.COM STAFF A new dress-code law reportedly passed in Iran this past week mandates the government to make sure that religious minorities - Christians, Jews and Zoroastrians - will have to adopt distinct colour schemes to make them identifiable in public, the Canadian National Post reported on Friday. Under the new law, which still awaits final approval from Iran's supreme leader Ayatollah Ali Khamenei, Jews will have to wear a yellow band on their exterior in public, while Christians will be required to don red ones. Internal Security Minister Avi Dichter responded to the new law Friday night, saying, "Whoever makes Jews anywhere wear the yellow star again, will find themselves in a coffin draped in black." Furthermore, according to the law, the Iranian government has envisioned that all Iranians wear "standard Islamic garments" designed to remove ethnic and class distinctions. The purpose for the law wa...